February 2010

I have an ongoing debate with my BFF (best fucking friend) Joe: Is it acceptable to have sex with an ex?

My BFF says that sex with his ex has created an open doorway for getting back together, which they have done more times than I can count. While I don’t advocate having sex with an ex, I have a confession to make: I’m still having sex with mine!  

And, OK, this is not my first time for screwing with an ex. When my ex-fiancée replaced me with his on-the-side girl, he and I had our own on-the-side sex. Ironic, isn’t it? He cheated on me with her, and then cheated on her with me.

How was it, you ask? Terrible! The worst sex I’ve ever had in my life. While it obviously was not a good idea, why did I do it? Closure is my lame excuse. I guess I needed our decade-long relationship to “come” to a close. Ha!

Why did he do it? I have no clue. I went to his house very late at night, unlocked the door, entered what was once our bedroom, got undressed, climbed into what had been our bed, and seduced him.

He cried and took forever to “get off.” My orgasm was pathetic. We used a condom (I wasn’t going to be totally reckless!) and that was weird. We had stopped using condoms long before. I was amused by his response. He didn’t ask me to stop grinding the hell out of him or ask me to leave, knowing he was cheating on his new girlfriend. Yet, he did hide the condom in the bottom of the trash so the girlfriend wouldn’t see it.

Although this escapade wasn’t my best sexual moment, sex with my more-current ex-boyfriend is still enjoyable. At least there is no crying or condom hiding. It does take longer for me to orgasm because I have a hard time reaching climax outside of a relationship. Even though I am familiar with him, he is just not that special anymore.

Do I recommend having sex with an ex? Hell no! I know I am doing it, but my hypocrisy—as my friends can attest—knows no bounds. I know I am playing with fire.

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